I miss the ability to walk quickly. Or to walk without any physical discomfort. Or walk at all.
I just heard Molly ask Google in the other room “How to spy on other people when they’re not watching?”
Now I have to Google “How to protect oneself from a spying child?”
No more turning off the lights for me at night time.
Molly came up with a new song:
“You were always boring
And now you’re having a baby
And you’ll be even more boring
So I have to find a new faaaamily!”
Cool. I don’t have to worry about dealing with three kids anymore.
Benny came up with a new game. It’s called “Secret”. You think of something – anything or anyone in the world – and the others have to guess what you thought of. They’re not allowed to ask any questions and you can’t give any hints.
In other words, the game is one person naming random things and Benny saying “No”.
Molly talking to a lady holding a baby at a service station:
-What’s his name?
(Long pause, Molly’s staring at the lady)
-Why does he only have half a name?
-I made a joke because his name sounds like half a salmon.
It always sucks when you have to explain your own jokes, but this one was objectively hard to get.
As a snack before sleep, Molly asked for an apple while Benny wanted some pickles and warm milk.
Add his constant mood changes and complaints about various aches in his body to the mix and I believe he might be experiencing a sympathetic pregnancy.
We spent our mother-daughter Saturday morning in Bauhaus, choosing the bathroom tiles.
As a reward for being patient and (almost) helpful, Molly chose a carnivorous plant, the Venus flytrap.
She then tried to trick the plant by “making noises like a fly” and feeding the plant some paper. It didn’t work.
My doctor: “You gained a bit too much weight for this stage of the pregnancy.”
Me: “How is that possible? I walk 90 minutes almost every day and I eat relatively healthy.”
Also me: finished a whole block of chocolate while watching The Apprentice on the sofa.
Benny’s rocking Winnie the Pooh style this morning.
He’s walking around sporting a Christmas sweater and a bare bum. Apparently, he’s very comfortable that way.
The evolution of thought:
2010: Life was so much easier when we didn’t have a dog.
2012: Life was so much easier with just a dog.
2015: Life was so much easier with just one child and a dog.
2018: Life was so much easier with two kids and just one dog.
to be expected in 2019: Life was so much easier with just two kids and two dogs.
I see a reoccurring pattern here and yet, every few years I get tricked! Damned those cute babies and puppies!